Act 1; Scene 2 – Take … Ande’s Mint


Open with wide shot, panning restaurant until stop on WAITER.  Follow waiter from table 1 to table 2 where he delivers dessert to COUPLE holding hands.  After coffee refilled, waiter departs.  Couple smiles coyly at each, then attention changes to dessert.  MAN begins immediately, while WOMAN  methodically removes rectangular mint from top of cheesecake and places it on side of plate.  Man finishes his dessert, sips coffee, and spots mint on side of plate.  Minutes later mint remains untouched; conversation is light/whimsical.  Man reaches over, retrieves mint, and brings to mouth, then stops.


You weren’t going to eat this, were you?


(horrified look on face)

I was saving it for last.  But not any more.   You breathed on it!

In my defense, I really didn’t think the mint was going to be eaten.  Far be it from me to let something, especially a dessert item, go to waste.  To this day,  I still plead ignorance.  IT WAS NOT INTENTIONAL, OKAY! Though it falls on deaf ears; my wife never lets me forget THAT story.

But it does resonate an ugly habit that is becoming all too prevalent lately.

It is easier to ask forgiveness, than it is permission.

A minor ‘cutting in line’  incident happened to me while loading the chair lift in Snowmass.   Since I was on vacation, I did not let the rude behavior of a stranger bother me.  I just flipped the bitch off and was on my way.  This perpetrator neither asked forgiveness nor permission.  So she got a double flip.  Later that day, I was sharing the story with a friend and he introduced me, if you will, to the phrase bold-faced above.  It didn’t take long before I realized how frequently the concept is abused.  Let’s not even talk customer service situations.  That has cluster fuck written all over it.

Unfortunately there is little that can be done.  Since the majority of the general public is comprised of idiots, the options are limited.  But … I’m still hopeful.

For me, I’m changing remember.  I’m no longer polite.  Moreover that creative retaliation I mentioned in a previous post will definitely be put to good use.

So, this will be fun. Very fun.


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