Rarely, are those words said to me. Unless it’s my wife wanting to ‘talk’ about the finances, of course. (heavy sigh) You see, socially, I’m an awkward conversationalist. It’s an occupational hazard – after twenty-five years in retail pharmacy, my goal is to streamline every conversation. “Let’s not talk until we need to” is my motto. That may sound harsh but I don’t fucking care. I get the job done. I am a very efficient professional communicator. With few negative responses, I might add. And, yes, I said that to a customer once. Before passing judgment, consider some of the sample conversations I’ve shared via this blog. Remember the sick chicken whose owner wanted to catheterize it. Hell, the first 100 pages of My Fictionalized Memoir are patient and employee anecdotes.
This whole ‘conversation’ topic came up when I read a recent Entertainment Weekly article. Four female entertainers were interviewed. Eva Longoria mentioned that when she is on the famed ‘red carpet’ she ‘pivots’ the conversation to her advantage . As an Indie author, I long to have such opportunities to talk book. Unfortunately, when I do, I lunge forcefully.
So, how do I pivot gracefully into being a better conversationalist?
First – there needs to be that desire. Right now, I have none. I want to talk to no one. Soon, very soon, my change will come and I will need this skill set to navigate my writing career path.
Second – Google it. Bing it. Mozilla Firefox it.
Third – Well, … I haven’t gotten here yet. I’m still on the second step. But I did find some interesting things.
http://www.essentiallifeskills.net/the-art-of-conversation.html
Quick-Tips for The Art of Conversation
- Do not dominate a conversation or make it all about you. A monologue is not conversation. This is my wife. Lucky me, eh?
- Show interest and curiosity in others. All I’m usually curious about is how some people actually function. Then I realize the majority don’t – they’re medicated.
- Strive for a balance of give and take. Retail pharmacy has taken way too much. I need some give.
- Be an active listener by maintaining good eye contact and asking pertinent questions. I totally rock this.
- Do not interrupt and cut in with your own ideas before the other person is finished speaking. I totally DON’T rock this.
- Although this is cliché, try to avoid topics such as sex, religion and politics. I never talk religion. Too personal. I know nothing about politics. Though it’s a bit ironic none of the 2016 candidates know anything about actual politics either. Hmm … . Lastly, I always go to the gutter. Oh well.
- Be prepared by staying on top of the latest news, developments and world events. Yeah, that probs won’t happen. And, my wife… . Well, her brother sarcastically nicknamed her Current Events. Thirty years ago.
Another section of the article focused on ways to ‘be interesting and have something to say’. Usually, I have something to say, but it is never interesting. And, rarely do my ramblings ‘make sense’.
However, with age I have learned a few things. Knowing when to ‘stop‘ is one of them.
