Honestly, this post has nothing to do with Autumn. But, it is that time of year. ‘Updates and understandings’ would probs be a more appropriate title. However, that usually referenced previously posted material and I understand less and less as I age. Thus, the title stands as is. Besides, I missed posting. This blog remains my calling card – need to keep current. Otherwise, the Yoda of all that is Blog might delete my website ass. Can’t let that happen. My buns of steel are one of my best attributes.
So, incessant rambling aside, on with the Nonsense.
- my #happynewyear has arrived as it does every September. This is one quirk I refuse to change. January is so cliche. Fortunately, my new writing project started. Unfortunately, Life has challenged progress. I will prevail. Damn it!
- My daughter loves ice. Personally, I could take or leave ice – buying ice is just dumb. Those bags smell fucking nasty after a few days. Still, I wanted to comply. In the scheme of parenting, ice is really, really low on the concern meter. Therefore, I bought ice trays. Now, I love ice. And, my daughter is happy.
- I stopped reading my horrorscope. It’s a long story – not even blog worthy.
- My landscape makeover was a welcome change. I so hated those fucking stones. Best of all, I removed a crusty, broken light post that would challenge even Thomas Kinkade’s creative abilities. A neighbor did most of the work. There were wires involved. Yikes.
- My garden was pathetic. My daughter worked at a Nursery this past Spring. To show support, I purchased my vegetable plants there. Yeah, big mistake. It’s not all bad. I did pick some peppers. But, there weren’t purple AND it was in October. Go figure, eh!?
- During a recent road trip to Chicago, I found some fun, bloggable billboard bits. A Urologist in Valparaiso, IN is offering a BOGO FREE on vasectomies. (pause) All I ever advertised was a Kindle All three, All free, All day promotional. I feel so … geld.
- Old people should NOT be allowed to own a cell phone. They have no idea whatsoever on how to use the damn thing. A mandatory shut the fuck up app should be pre uploaded onto their phones if purchased, though.
- The new Shingles vaccine finally became available. Ugh! Now, there’s a shortage on High Dose Flu Shots. Yeah! I take way too much satisfaction informing the senior population of such a travesty. (sarcasm intended)
- Sign lady is officially … retired? Or, she succumbed to a worse fate. Hmm … . Worse -whomever took over didn’t read the manual. That shit posted on them there marquee ain’t very funny. To add insult to reading injury, the grammar rivals my last sentence. On the bright side, I did see a random marquee around town boost a rather thoughtful proverb – Sign in need of repair. Then again, aren’t we all?
- Last, but certainly not least, I am headed to Iowa for my 30 year reunion. Crazy, eh? Neither MasterCard Moment nor Ode will follow. I have moved on. Besides, I use VISA now.
Well, that’s about it on My Non-Fictionalized Life over the last few months. Even though I have moved on, some Adam Thomas blogging traditions are fast approaching that I may indulge. If I didn’t, Adele would never forgive me.
In closing – couldn’t resist this ‘ice’ cold blast from the past.
