the key

Quite some time ago, I was fortunate to listen to a little ditty about an actual key. Oh, Jack and Diane had nothing to do with that ditty either. Apparently, the storyteller found a random key around his house. Since he had no idea what the key unlocked, he tagged the key and placed it in a familiar location just in case he remembered After a year, he came upon the key again and realized he still had no clue of its purpose. So, he threw the key in the garbage. If he didn’t need the key in an entire year, he ain’t gonna need it in the next ten, eh?!

I was both amused and intrigued by the tale. So much so, I decided to use this concept when housekeeping. I have never been much of a pack-rack. As far as I am concerned, either recycle or just throw the damn thing away – if it doesn’t have a purpose I don’t have a reason to keep it.

Fast-forward to present day.

I recently purchased an older car. When the previous owner handed over the key to the vehicle, he said he had misplaced the spare. Since I would be the only driver, this wasn’t that big of a deal. However, every so often I would have a panic attack about either losing the key or, worse, locking it in the car. I queried the dealer about a replacement. Not to my surprise. a new key for my old car was approximately $273 plus $150 to program the key.

A bit rich for my car-ry ass.

The seller told me he would keep looking. Silly as it may sound, I believed him. In the height of a recent attack, I messaged him again. It had been a minute, so it was warranted. Much to my dismay, it remained lost. Ugh! I went back to the dealer to see what options existed. To my surprise there were a few.  And, it confused the shit out of me. The original price was for a key, the fob/remote control, engine sensor, and the programming. All this for a 2007! Ugh, Ugh!! Thankfully, all these things could be acquired separately AND much cheaper. Unfortunately, I am not a gear head. I was completely overwhelmed with his explanation. Don’t throw me any shade, okay!? For something as simple as a replacement key, it was  anything but. In his vast expertise, Mr. worker dude was done with me and my ignorance as much as I was done with him and his explanation. Ugh, Ugh Ugh!

Finally, he suggested a valet key. All that will do is open and lock the door manually which would definitely curb some panic. More importantly, I can upgrade at any time.  He would just need the car AT the dealership to program it accordingly. (insert: guttural noise of frustrated disappointment)

For now though,  I am content with my decision. I guess I will just unlock that door if and when something happens.

Then again, maybe lock not.


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