Condition –
Resting Bitch Face (RBF) –
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3v98CPXNiSk&feature=youtu.be
a person, usually a girl, who naturally looks mean when her face is expressionless, without meaning to.“Nah, she’s just got a resting bitch face, she’s actually really sweet.”
… I believe it came to popular usage around the same time Kristen Stewart rose to fame. Stewart, along with Victoria Beckham, Megan Fox, and Renée Zellwegger among others, is a classic example of BRF with her glazed eyes, stern brows, and hardly-there smirk.
Topic Overview –
While I ain’t no one’s ‘Bitch’ by any means, my ‘Resting Face’ has … similarly unattractive qualities. Prickish asshole sums it up quite well. Not really the most approachable face for the most trusted profession, eh? Once a customer actually told me that my “… eyes were blood shot and (I) needed to shave. (I looked) like my dog just died.” Unfortunately for him, I looked better that day than he-will-ever-look on his best day. Who says that to somebody? Regardless, I think it’s something I need to work on. Or at least change up this ‘face’ a bit so it’s less asshole more smolderingly sexy. That’s possible. Right? Probs not.
In conversation, I’ve polled friends and co-workers for a male version/term of RBF. However, the few suggestions offered paled in desired impact. Nothing had the cohesive sounding flow as the female counterpart. Think about it. Resting Bitch Face just has a nice ring to it. So women get to keep RBF for themselves while we men remain assholes, douchebags, and pricks. Could be worse, I guess.
Causes –
For me, it’s definitely an occupational hazard. Working 25 years in retail really zaps that zip from your do-da. Believe it or not I was a nice guy before retail. I’ve had conversations with some friends who have actually gotten out and decompressed. Ya know, be able to go out in public and interact appropriately without developing some nervous twitch. I’m told it’s possible. Sadly, decompression time is exponential to the time served. If that’s the case, than I’m fucked.
Treatment options –
- Laughter – even though my 14 day window has come and gone. I can still laugh. Or try to. ( knock, knock 10-08-2015)
- Letting the color flow, of course. While the trending coloring books are chick-lit, I may have to pay a visit to the dollar store to pick up an old fashioned, less complex version. (the ADULT coloring book 10-25-2015)
- For me, the treatment of choice is a two week notice. (two week notice 09-15-2015)
References –
http://www.elle.com/culture/news/a15323/resting-bitch-face-syndrome/
Urban Dictionary
‘Rosie’ library staff at neighborhood branch
Observational / previously published data tabulated by the author of this post.
*Note: www.ASKrandomnonsense.com is NOT an actual site
