bumper stickers and billboards and bargains

I have officially left ‘Kansas’. Translation: I’m transitioning. That’s more of an ‘Oh,my‘ than the Wizard could ever bestow. Unfortunately, this has nothing to do with my professional existence.  The transition refers to my marquee based posts.  Like I stated a few months ago, sign lady is back.  Sadly, her wit has NOT accompanied her return.  Maybe she is more like that steel trap than anticipated – very rusty and illegal in 39 states. Considering the fact that she had only one funny ‘proverb’ which warranted inclusion, I had to look elsewhere.

Bumper-stickers

Being politically correct, doesn’t mean you  ARE correct.

Wow! Where do I begin? Honestly, my comments will be few.  First, that is such a controversial topic – well beyond the scope of this post AND blog, for that matter. Second, I avoid anything political.

But, I will say one thing.  Just like everything else, political correctness has gotten out of hand.  When did everyone get so fucking sensitive?  Pansies.  It’s ridiculous.  Quit complaining and shut the fuck up!

and billboards

This space available.

During my travel hockey days, I drove. A lot. Hence, I saw my share of billboards.  The majority were ads/promos for various state attractions. Few were funny by any means.  Hockey travel is over.  Now, I don’t get out much.  I always liked the idea of billboards and wanted to include one here.  But, for the life of me I couldn’t think of any that were suitable. I could’ve googled examples, but that would be wrong. I do have standards, ya know. Therefore, I’m keeping my options open. Regardless of anything else, it gave me a great idea for a musical selection to accompany this post.

and bargains

Today’s special: Buy two items – pay full price for both.

That’s fucking hilarious.  Sign lady done good with this maxim. I am the shopper for the family.  Sales make me crazy.  Correction – what retailers do to fuck with pricing to influence spending makes me crazy.  It would be way too simple to walk into a store and  buy something that is actually on sale. (pauses implied). Instead, you either have to have a Rewards card or coupon that’s only available on-line. Best part – you don’t know you need the damn coupon until you are at check-out.

True story – I needed a throw rug for the garage entryway.  So, I went to an upscale retailer.  I found exactly what I wanted. And, it was advertised as being ‘On Sale’. Little did I know that the ‘Sale’ didn’t start for two weeks.  However, I could still buy the item for the SALE PRICE that day BUT, I  needed to return two weeks later when the sale actually started to pick the item up. (more than ever – pauses implied)

How twisted is that shit?  Auntie Em would never comply. Lions, and tigers and bears are nothing compared to bumper stickers, and billboards, and bargains.

Oh, my!

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