A Canadian MasterCard Event

time spent ‘talking’ to a Garmin representative regarding my Canada map ‘download’:     1 hour, 13 minutes AND 9 seconds

ONroute  service stops along Highway 401 and 402 Sarnia to Montreal:     23

number of stairs in hotel:     115 east stairwell and 142 west stairwell

‘comedic’ events that made this hockey weekend memorable:     countless 

Recently, the team headed to Toronto for a ‘TwoNations’ Hockey tournament.  It was quite the experience.  This was probably the truest of all MasterCard moments because I did, in fact, use my MasterCard for everything.  I didn’t want to be bothered with leftover Canadian money.  Besides, the exchange rate was ideal and there was no penalty.

I hate my new GPS. Of course, I purchased a model that did NOT come with Canadian maps.  Imagine that. When I attempted to return /exchange  the device, an employee convinced me otherwise.  He said that the maps could easily be uploaded for a ‘nominal’ charge from the website. It was neither easy nor nominal.  I hate that guy.  He was bald.  The last bald guy I listened to was a butcher who gave me ill advice about haircuts.  And, well, everyone knows how that ended.  This GPS fiasco wasn’t much better.  BUT, my MapQuest directions were printed.  I was able to keep on schedule.  I hate my new GPS.

Canada has this truck stop / rest area/ gas oasis thing goin’ down along Highway 401 and 402 – ONroute Canada.  Each stop has a variety of fast food establishments and gas stations in an easy off – easy on access to the expressway.  Works for me.


I utilize hotel fitness centers when travelling as much as possible. Especially when the surrounding area is questionable, the location undesirable, or the weather is frightful.  Fortunately, this hotel had a better than average facility AND nine floors.  Translation – buns of steel, baby.  Or should I say concrete? The reason for the discrepancy in stair count is because the west stairwell had roof and basement access.

Even though the girls didn’t fair too well in the tournament, they did enjoy themselves.  Hell, none of the Detroit teams advanced either.  I’m convinced  Canadian girls are born with skates already laced and hockey pucks for pacifiers.

About those countless comedic events – Yeah … .  Here are just a few.  In chronological order, of course –

  • the garbage ‘basket’ in my car was annoying – we pitched it  in a neighbors trash can before we left the subdivision
  • the Subway in Port Huron is totally sketch – the old man with the cane even sketchier
  • there was a boarder crossing incident – why wouldn’t there be? I didn’t get searched, but … .
  • Toronto drivers suck.  Canada has NO Rules for their Roads.  U-turns are acceptable – EVERYWHERE.  So, I fit in just fine.
  • Toronto pedestrians suck, too.  They jay walk everywhere and anytime, frequenting the medians at night – DRESSED IN BLACK.  Even the joke – “How many points for that one?” got old.
  • I unknowingly ‘crashed’ a corporate holiday party.  I was the only white male in the establishment.  Very awkward.
  • Ironically, the girls had a great time.  The parents had the meltdowns.

And then I drove home.


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