Over my many years of posting, I have presented those wonderful proverbs various local business marquees had to offer. I even took a walk on the wild side, throwing in the beguiling wisdom of billboards. Once, I got really risque and sighted the riddling magic that IS the bumper sticker.
Gasp!
Yes, I survived. Not that I am any wiser, mind you. Marquees, billboards, and bumper stickers (oh my!) – sorry, couldn’t resist – rarely induce deep thought But, they provide a brief pondering and, more importantly, that much needed comic relief that is becoming sadly less abundant these days.
Recently, I was out and about town, running errands which ultimately lead me to two of the following maxims. Sign lady may be gone. However, neither her nor her words are resting in peace. Be that as it may, Roy’s still boasts material to post. The second prompted me to go deep into the catacombs of rational Do It Yourself yearnings of … mail delivery?
Hmm… .
With a lead-in hook like that, I have no other choice but to wax philosophically.
Why doesn’t Tarzan have a beard?
Oddly enough, I never thought about it; few probably have. Why would you? Tarzan’s lack of facial hair isn’t discussed extensively in everyday conversation. Yes, the hair is long, But, there is No beard. So, I did what every respectable, lazy blogger does and googled it. According to Disney, ‘The fact that Tarzan was beardless is because all sexy Disney leading men are clean-shaven.’
End of argument, right? Hell, this IS Disney. How can anyone question that reasoning? Though it would be really, really funny if at least one the Tarzan movies premiered in … Noverbeard. (pun so intended)
I’m not letting Tarzan get off that easy. If we are putting that much thought into his appearance, his hair should technically be longer. Like at least ten feet longer – and that’s being conservative. According to the American Academy of Dermatology, the average amount of hair growth in a year is 6 inches So, if the dude is in his mid-twenties when Jane comes calling, that would be a lot more locks. Rapunzel would so be jelly.
Life is short – smile while you still have teeth
Contrary to what might be expected, this was not on a dental office marquee. It was an Insurance Broker. Go figure,eh!? With over thirty years of retail under my belt, I’ve seen people with no teeth smile. Yikes! Neglecting dental hygiene is highly over-rated.
Save the Mail!
Alas, I come to my DYI doodling. As I drove by the Post Office on that fateful, yet postal inspiring day. (you guessed it, pun intended) I saw a man peacefully sitting in a lawn chair. Perched on his lap was a homemade sign that read – SaVe tHE MAil. I think it was done in, you guessed it again, crayon.
Yeah, … .
Just because it is a new decade – ugh! And, such an exciting one at that – bigger ugh!! Here is a random jab, celebrating the occasion. Unfortunately, the year isn’t even close to be over. biggest ugh of all!!!
The Year 2020 reviewed – one star – not recommended.
As far as I’m concerned, one star is way generous.
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