a very random, yet seasonally appropriate burning question

Easter is just a few days away, but I work retail, so the Easter promotional aisle has been set since, like, the day after Valentine’s Day.  Every day I’m bombarded with the seasonal candy offerings.  A good friend of mine actually looks forward to the appropriately shaped Snickers, Reece’s and whatever else manufacturer’s can shape things into to sell every holiday.  I, on the other hand, rarely eat candy.  No, I’m not a freak.   Well, okay, I am a freak, but not because of that.  I ‘ve just never really been a ‘snacker’.  However,  every Easter I purchase the token bag of Brach’s Classic Jelly Beans.   I never really eat the whole bag.  Usually I have a handful, realize how grotesquely sweet they taste and put the remainder in the community candy drawer at the pharmacy.  Then, I’m good for the year.

Face it, jelly beans are as basic as Easter candy can get.  Every company has them – Lifesavers, Skittles, Starburst, Jolly Ranchers.  I think they even have Blow Pop  and/or Tootsie Roll versions.

Why I am ranting about this innocent Easter staple?

I’ll continue.

A few years back, I proceeded to buy the ‘yearly bag’ and noticed that the Brach’s Classic version I had always selected changed.  The word Jelly Beans was replaced with Jelly Bird Eggs.   What’s up with that? What the hell is a Jelly Bird Egg? More importantly,  what the hell did they do to my Jelly Beans?

The answer was simple – absolutely nothing.  They looked the same, tasted the same, and … I even ate the same amount.

So what’s up with the verbiage change?  No idea.  Yes, it taunted me every time I passed the aisle, but after that, I forgot about it.  Until 300 plus days later of course, when  just like Easter it resurfaced.  I’d buy the bag and complain to whomever was around me about the supid jelly bird egg thing, eat the damn candy and call it good.


To solve this mystery I went directly to the source.  I e-mailed Brach’s, asking what was up?

Did I sound like a complete dork in that e-mail that even  I would  make fun of? Yes.  Did I get an answer? Yes.


Thank you for contacting Ferrara Candy Company regarding Brach’s® Classic Jelly Bird Eggs. Hearing from our consumers better enables us to continue to provide quality products and services.  Consumer feedback is very important to us, and we appreciate the opportunity to respond.

Our Brach’s Jelly Bird Eggs are basically our seasonal variety of Jelly Beans.  It is simply a way to differentiate between an everyday and a seasonal item.

Now about that Easter Bunny … .

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