12 hours – 12 thoughts – 0 monkeys?

This is how I got through my last 12 hour day, short staffed, on only 3 hours of sleep AND my BF RPh from another store was ON VACATION.

9am     –   I CAN do this.  False optimism, wishful thinking, suppressed denial – Hmmm… .   Ask me at 9pm.

10am   –   Doughnut WITH sprinkles.  Mandatory for every 12 hour day regardless of circumstances.

11am   –   “I’m on vacation and … .”  Shut the fuck up and go back home. By the way, cowboy hats in Northern Michigan look really stupid.

12pm   –   Ring. Ring. “The store across town isn’t answering the phone.  Could you please call there and have someone call me back?”  No!  End call.  Saying good-bye is so overrated.

1pm     –   Comment about my lack of enthusiasm when I tell a customer to ‘have a nice day’.  Okay, then.  ‘Fuck off and go away.’ Is that better?

2pm     –   Twenty-something white male – ?-  with freakish hair AND a butterfly tattoo ON HIS NECK asks where the douches are located.           Two thoughts – look in the mirror and ask the Girl with the Dragon Tattoo and see how well that goes.  

3pm     –   Half way there.  Unsettling, random thought on the state of health care attitudes – Does anyone ever get better? Does anyone want to?

4pm     –   Ring. Ring, “I’m here for the summer and need a prescription filled, but it’s complicated.” Two wordsindefinite Hold.

5pm     –  When I say, “I’ll be with you in a moment.”  It is NOT an invitation to continue speaking.

6pm     –   “Where are the Preparation H and condems located?”  Aisle 5 – next to the catheters for sick chickens.  

7pm     –   I hate everyone. I could probably use another doughnut right about now.

8pm     –  Ring. Ring,     “Are you still open?”  Why do you think I’m answering the phone?

9pm     –   All of the above.

Now about that Monkey reference … .

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