missed opportunity?

Maybe not –

So, last weekend I was downstate for my daughter’s  State Hockey Tournament.  The team did  great and it was fun.  But, something happened – or didn’t happen – that prompted the idea for this post.


On Saturday, I got wind that Elle MacPherson was actually in the vicinity, watching her stepson play hockey.  You can only imagine my reaction, especially considering my ‘tribute’ post to Sports Illustrated Swimsuit models in April 2014.  I mapquested her location.  The vicinity turned out to be a bit of a distance.  Remember though, THS IS ELLE MACPHERSON.  Still, there were obligations.  Fortunately, those obligations were appropriately timed.  Which meant getting in my car, racing to the rink to see Elle , then returning before my daughter’s  next game was so doable.  If  John and Dave, my friends from college, were there I wouldn’t have thought twice about doing such a thing.  However, they weren’t.  And, I think way too much.  Translation – I didn’t go.

Heavy sigh!

Retrospectively, it’s probably better that I stayed behind.

First of all, the week before some tanker exploded on I-94 and, like, burned the expressway.  This IS Detroit, mind you. Expressways burn on a regular basis there.  So, the road was closed.  I have enough detours in my life that I need to deal with, knowingly venturing off on  a new one would totally ruin the spontaneity of the mission.

Second of all, my ‘seemingly harmless excursion’  has stalker AND ‘weird creepy’ written all over it.  Remember, I AM done with that shit, man.

Lastly, and more importantly, what would I have said? Think about it.  I’m really bad in those types of situations. I often ramble with the written word.  So you can only imagine what I would be like in a nervous confrontation –  WITH ELLE MACPHERSON.  My mouth would probably hang open; drool running down the side of my cheek.  It wouldn’t be  pretty.

It would be a totally different situation if say, I was at a function and was introduced to Ms. MacPherson by a mutual party.  Yes, that scenario would  probably never happen, but … .

Heavy sigh!

I asked a few friends what each would say if confronted with meeting their equivalent of Elle MacPherson.   A friend likened her response to an SNL skit with Chris Farley  interviewing Paul McCartney.  I tried desperately hard to find that clip, but couldn’t.  While the bit I decided to include is ‘awkward’ in a different way, it is seriously funny.


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