THIS is NEXT

This IS one of those posts that embodies my essence of Nonsense.  But, if you think about it, it is not that Random because it happens often -especially in conversation. NOTE: DO NOT think about it too hard because it will really, really fuck you up.

“Next” always refers to something that you are not able to choose right now. “This” always refers to whatever you can choose right now.

My whole contention with these two words started back in my college days, driving to and from school on various outings.  Remember, this was 30 years ago. GPS was unavailable.  We relied on maps AND roadway signs for directions.  Often NEXT EXIT became THIS EXIT way too fast.  Or NEXT EXIT was truly THIS EXIT.  In both scenarios, YOU MISSED IT was the ultimate reality.  I’m convinced it was some conspiracy theory planned by the DOT intended to fuck with drivers.  The instigators then sat in an office in an undisclosed location, sipping coffee looking at some techy grid. Smiling.  Luckily, GPS has ‘fixed’ the problem. Though, I’m convinced even Siri has ulterior directional motives.

Baby Driver has NO confusion about what’s NEXT

Recently, I e-mailed a friend inquiring about his job transfer.  Originally I was told he would leave town in March.  Since I had heard about this transfer a few months back, I assumed THIS March, meaning 2018.  In his response, he stated the new assignment would be NEXT JULY.   The email was right around the New Year.  So… . Does he mean July 2018 or July 2019?  To this day, I still have no idea when he is leaving.  Quite frankly, I’m embarrassed to ask.

Similarly enough, I finished reading a preview about an upcoming movie that is supposed to open NEXT December.  Further in the article, the release date of December 2018 was referenced twice.  Yes, this was a January 2018 volume. Therefore, the article was written, then proofed sometime in 2017.  Hmm… .

See why I’m confused.  See why I also warned – DO NOT  think about it too hard.  It seriously messes with you.

I disagree that “this Friday” only has meaning if it is Friday. It means: the Friday that is not in question. Next Friday means, the one after that. If there is not a “this” at the present moment (hard to imagine with a day of the week) then it gets confusing. For a day or two after the weekend, “this weekend” actually refers to the weekend that just passed, as in: “What did you do this weekend?”

I’m a pretty direct guy, especially in conversation.  I chose my words efficiently to facilitate communication. (EXCEPTION: blog rambling, of course) I stress action verbs and use as few words as possible.   That’s why THIS  – NEXT conundrum is total shit.  Do it NOW and shut the fuck up!

Lastly, the real cluster occurs when there is a line  of customers at the pharmacy counter and the cashier asks “who’s ...

NEXT

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